I hate that. No, no, do not envy my illness. My illness did not make me creative. It's something that kills people. DO NOT ENVY IT, PLEASE.

And don't treat me like I'm less human or less worthy of kindness and care, because if I was loved I wouldn't make beautiful things. FUCK. FUUUUUUCK. That just makes me so angry. The people in my life have actually said things like that and it's just made getting well so much harder. No, no, if I am not at least neurologically and psychologically functional then I am not able to really write a full work and take crit and get published. That's just how it is. I want to explode this myth SO BAD.